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Your source for Lord of the Rings News, Updates, Poetry, Art, Parody and Satire.
Issue 36, Volume 2, September 3rd, 2004.
Staff:
Editors: Perian, Xara.
Primary Reporter: Ivy.
Chief Correspondent: Prongs.
Contributor(s): Sam, Cerridwen.
Tolkien's Descriptions
By Xara
Ask any person you know who has tried and failed to read Lord
of the Rings why they gave up on it and you will receive the same
answer. "The descriptions were just too damn long!" Tolkien has often
been criticised for his lengthy, but very poetic descriptions of the
landscapes of Middle Earth. However I ask you, why is that such a bad
thing? Certainly the first time you read it when you're dying to know
what happens they do seem to hold the story back a bit, but once you
come to know the story, the descriptions are some of the best bits!
Furthermore, I have reason to greatly revere Tolkien for his masterful
descriptions (his masterful everything actually but let's focus on this
one point today), they're so hard to write! And yet he seems to do them
with such ease! Genius!
The descriptions in the Lord of the Rings are not just pretty,
they bring Middle Earth to life. They give the landscape a character of
it's own. The Dead Marshes, Weathertop, Lothlorien, each has it's own
unique, individual feel, because of the amazing descriptions! And so,
without further ado, a tribute to the descriptions of Tolkien's Lord of
the Rings! Amazing.
"Presently it grew altogether dark: the air itself seemed black
and heavy to breathe. When the lights appeared Sam rubbed his eyes: he
thought his head was going queer. He first saw one with the corner of
his left eye, a wisp of pale sheen that faded away; but others appeared
soon after: some like dimly shining smoke, some like misty flames
flickering slowly above unseen candles; here and there they twisted
like ghostly sheets unfurled by hidden hands." (The Dead Marshes, Book
4, The Two Towers).
"Upon great pedestals founded in the deep waters stood two great
kings of stone: still with blurred eyes and crannied brows they frowned
upon the North. The left hand of each was raised palm outwards in a
gesture of warning; in each right hand there was an axe; upon each head
there was a crumbling helm and crown. Great power and majesty they
still wore, the silent wardens of a long-vanished kingdom." (The Great
River, Book 2, The Fellowship of the Ring)
"And the ship went out into the High Sea and passed on into the
West, until at last on a night of rain Frodo smelled a sweet fragrance
on the air and heard the sound of singing that came over the water. And
then it seemed to him that as in his dream in the house of Bombadil,
the grey-rain curtain turned all to silver glass and was rolled back,
and he beheld white shores and beyond them a far green country under a
swift sunrise." (The Grey Havens, Book 6, The Return of the King)
"The standing stone was cold, and it cast a long pale shadow
that stretched eastward over them. The sun, a pale watery yellow, was
gleaming through the mist just above the west wall of the hollow in
which they lay; north, south, and east beyond the wall the fog was
thick, cold and white. The air was silent, heavy and chill. Their
ponies were standing crowded with their heads down." (Fog on the Barrow
Downs, Book 1, The Fellowship of the Ring)
Elves and Dwarves: A Brief History
By Ivy.
Anyone who has read (or seen) The Lord of the Rings will
remember that Legolas and Gimli were very cold toward each other until
they were drawn together in war and became great friends. While that
may be all fine and well and "Awwww", does anyone really remember why
the Elves and the Dwarves disliked each other so? I had no idea, so I
decided to do a bit of research.
Dwarves were a very sturdy race. They were short and stout, most
of them living deep in mountains or caves. They were great craftsmen,
often mining gold, jewels, and other such things for weapons and
adornment. They spoke a very complicated and guttural language. The
Elves, on the other hand, were tall and graceful. They did everything
with ease and most other races looked upon them in awe. They lived in
the forests and spoke in a language that was both beautiful and
pleasing to the ear.
Jealousy is, therefore, a cause of many of the feuds between the
two races. Their biggest, though, was that the Dwarves were not Eru's
favourite race. That would have been the Elves. One of the Valar
created the Dwarves out of impatience for Eru to do his work. While Eru
was angry, he allowed the Dwarves to live but sentenced them to life in
the mountains until the Elves awoke, and even after there would be many
problems between them. Apparently, though, the Dwarves decided to stay
in the mountains, even though they could not hide from the Elves.
When the Ring was rediscovered, though, the two races were
forced to put aside their small fights and jealousies and come together
to help destroy the greatest evil of the world. When this happens,
Legolas and Gimli eventually do become friends, and it is even said
that Gimli joins Legolas when he makes his trip to the Undying Lands.
And even then, it is said that the whole thing was part of Eru's plan.
Kinda romantic, innit?
So Ends the Battle of Pelennor
By Perian
Eowyn, sister-daughter of King Theoden, was a shieldmaiden of
Rohan and the caretaker of her ageing leader. A "daughter of kings" as
Aragorn said. With these qualifications, and her calm observation of
the decaying of the life she had known, a certain level of patience and
rationality were a prominent part of her character.
Were, that is, until the 15th of March, 3019. Then, in an
unsurpassed act which is recounted often as one of the greatest in
Middle-earth history, she cast aside not only her patience and
rationale, but every semblance of sanity she possessed, and challenged
the Lord of the Nazgul, the infamous Witch King of Angmar, to a
battle over the body of her king. Such bravery, such devotion, such
damned foolish, suicidal rage. A bit out of character for the White
Lady of Rohan, that not-so-delicate but certainly not decisive flower
in the frost.
How did she do it? Was it out of protectiveness for her uncle?
Certainly not! If that were the case, she would have struck down Grima
Wormtongue long before. Battle fury? Impossible. When any creature came
within leagues of any one of the nazgul, his or her first reaction
would be to fall to the ground, grovel a bit, and run if possible. In
fact, there is but one factor which might set her apart from her fellow
humans upon the field: PMS.
Yes, you read right. The monthly curse may well have saved the
Free Peoples of Middle-earth. Think of it: There are generally two
things which will drive a female to kill an adversary. One is in
defence of offspring, but we all know that Eowyn had no offspring. The
other... now you're catching on.
It's not a situation unheard of even in our time. In coming up
with this theory the writer was reminded of an experience of her own in
the ultimate battlefield; a restaurant. If you have ever worked in one,
you know the sentiment. Once each month every female staff member
suddenly "goes off the deep end". The meek assistant can be observed to
let a heavy door swing closed on the cranky waitress bearing a tray of
glasses, the hostess may snap at a request for water, the manager might
fly into rage at the kitchen staff's choice of music. On this day it
becomes clear that there is a crazed shieldmaiden lurking in every
woman.
Then, after the rage has worn down, there comes a time of
moping, complaining, listlessness, and general self-pity. Eowyn went
through this as well, taking to be (well? Even Merry was able to drag
himself as far as Minas Tirith before being found and losing
consciousness,) and not coming back even to Aragorn's summons. After
all, why should she? She'd had a rotten day, and then there was that man
in black robes (men suddenly become the source of all the world's
woes as I'm sure you lads among our readers have noticed) who
tried to make it worse, and now here's the guy who recently revealed he
was engaged trying to wake her up? Dream on, Ranger. Sleeping Beauty
likes it where she is.
As much as we would all like to believe that it was in her
nature to be recklessly daring, 'twas a feat which could not be
accomplished by personality and skill alone. Had that been the case it
might have been done by a man or an elf. It was no man who slew the
second greatest nemesis living (or unliving) in the Third Age of
Middle-earth, but a woman. A woman with a nasty cramp and an
unsurpassable quantity of attitude.
Morgoth - Search For the Dark Lord
By Xara
When Feanor of the Noldor heard of his father's murder and
the theft of his beloved Silmarils, he cursed the evil Melkor and named
him Morgoth, meaning Dark Lord. But was Melkor, or Morgoth as he is now
known, really deserving of such a title? Certainly he was evil, the
most evil being to walk to the face of Middle Earth in fact. But did he
really qualify as a Dark Lord? In order to answer this question we must
first clarify, what constitutes a Dark Lord? Well, a Dark Lord is
obviously a lord of a dark land. But then, was Morgoth a Dark Lord? He
was lord of the great fortress Angband and, whilst I'm sure it was
pretty dark inside, so was any building in Middle Earth at night, due
to their lack of electricity, and outside there was no unusual darkness
in the area. So then, perhaps Morgoth really wasn't a Dark Lord!
But then, if Morgoth wasn't the Dark Lord of Middle Earth, then
who was? Now, Sauron would be the obvious choice. He was often known as
the Dark Lord amongst other things, but we've already discovered one
supposed Dark Lord who was in fact no such thing at all, so do not let
names deceive you! We must examine the facts. Sauron was certainly a
lord, the lord of Mordor in fact. But was Mordor dark? Yes, I hear you
say, but how can you be so sure, have you been there yourself? There
are few who have entered Mordor and lived to tell the tale, and those
who have are no longer available for comment. So we must use the
limited knowledge at hand to find the truth. And that is this, what
else was Mordor known as? Why! The Land of Shadow!! Shadow, a word
signifying a state of semi-darkness. So Mordor was not fully dark? But
then, Sauron cannot be a Dark Lord!
There are other candidates though, for the position of Dark Lord
of Middle Earth. You need only to look at a map of Middle Earth to spot
some rather dark looking places where some lords could be hiding.
There's Mirkwood for instance. Now, according to the first-hand account
of the traveller Bilbo Baggins that place is particularly dark and
murky. Could there be any lords there though? Well, there's Thranduil,
but no, he's a King. Hang on a minute! What about Legolas?! Wait, no,
false alarm, he's a prince, not a lord. Ah well. Shall we move on? How
about under mountains? It's got to be pretty dark down there. And yes!
Lots of people live under there! Dwarves in fact! Perhaps Dain is the
Dark Lord? And yet no, he too is a King, not a lord.
Perhaps we're looking in the wrong places. Perhaps we should be
looking for lords rather than dark? How many people in Middle Earth are
lords? There can't be many, it's a pretty prestigious title. How about,
Lord Celeborn? He is definitely a lord, and, yes! He lives in a dark
place! Now, I know you might think Lothlorien's not very dark, but
think about it. Mordor doesn't qualify as dark, it's got all those wide
open spaces. But Lothlorien, that's a wood where grow the tallest trees
in the world! It's got to be pretty dark under those trees.
Now, you might think it unlikely that Celeborn is the Dark Lord.
He is married to the Lady of Light after all. But then, hasn't it
always been said that opposites attract? And that is certainly true of
polar water molecules, so why not elves as well? Ladies and gentlemen,
I think we may have a winner! Celeborn, our very own Dark Lord! And not
a bit as evil as his name suggests! Who says darkness is always a bad
thing? Not I!
Goodbye - A Word, But What A Hard Word To Say.
By Prongsie
I must say that it has been one heck of a busy summer! So much to do, so little spare time … and in exactly one week, university begins again. As I sat at my desk, trying to think of an article to write, I list the possible reasons why the juices are not flowing. Part of it is anxiety, part of it fatigue … and part of it is because my baby brother is going off to university tomorrow and I am going to miss him. Yes, you heard correctly: I am going to miss my brother. The Tormentor, the person who makes fun of me day after day; he’s leaving home now.
Growing up, I was always the one that he
came to when he needed help with his chemistry or math or physics
problems … he was always the one I went to when the computer
malfunctioned. In spite of the silly (but enjoyable) fights that we
have, we do have a good relationship - one that I parallel to the
friendship between Frodo and Sam. He is a loyal friend and confidante
and it really does stink that he’s leaving home. Wow, do I know what
Sam felt like when Frodo was leaving for the Grey Havens! Yeesh, this
is so not a warm, fuzzy feeling … it’s more like
throat-constricting-almost-going-to-cry-but-not-quite type of a
feeling. I don’t like it.
Frodo
and Sam had been through so much together - from the time they departed
the Shire, through Bree and Rivendell - where Sam could have left Frodo
and returned to the Shire. Think about it, Sam was not summoned to the
Council of Elrond … had he not snuck in, he would not have been aware
that Frodo volunteered to destroy the Ring and he wouldn’t have gone
with Frodo to Mordor.
But,
as we all know, he chose to go with Frodo … and away they went …
through the Misty Mountains and Lothlorien and Emyn Muil … where once
again, Frodo was prepared to leave without Sam but no way was Sam going
to allow that! On and on they went, through the Marshes, past the Black
Gate and through Shelob's Lair … Sam was a beacon of hope to Frodo,
always encouraging him to keep going. Moving from Canada to the Middle
East then back to Canada was hard on my family - the constant changing
of schools, changing of houses, making new friends … we have both had
our ups and downs in life, but through it all, I’m glad to say, we were
there for each other. I remember this one particular time - I was in
high school in the Middle East and I was talking to my “guidance”
counsellor about applying to Canada for university … she told me that I
had zero chance of getting into a good Canadian school - which is
exactly what an aspiring doctor/ scientist wants to hear, you know?
(Please, note the sarcasm.) I was so ashamed to tell my friends, but I
did tell my brother, and he said that … well, he used quite a lot of
colourful language which cannot be repeated here so let’s just say that
he cheered me up that day … and it’s something that I will forever
remember.
Sure
we fought … even close friends fight … “Go home, Sam” … but he has
always been around when I needed someone to talk to, to whine to, to go
to a movie with, to be rescued from the evil, yapping dog … “Leave him
alone.” - Sam to Shelob in Cirith Ungol, Return of the King. and now
it’s time for him to leave home and, I’ve gotta tell you, it really
does suck to have him go … a lot like it sucked for Sam to see Frodo
go. Anyway, they say writing is therapy … and I feel a lot better after
writing this … so thanks, you guys, for putting up with my rambling …
thanks for reading and thanks for caring. Peace out. God Bless.
Reviews.
The Unfinished Tales by J.R.R. Tolkien
By Perian
Fanfiction.
This Fortnight: Midnight Flower
By Cerridwen
Part One - Continued.
Eiliandel looked at Novrion. Novrion looked at Eiliandel. They both looked at their bed. Then they looked back at each other. "I'll just go over here," Novrion broke the silence, and headed over to one side of the bed. Eiliandel paused a moment and then went over to the other side. Novrion watched her for a moment as she sat down on the bed. He couldn't believe that after all the time he'd known her that they were being shy now. It took them quite a while to finally get into their bed, and even longer for sleep to take them.
"And at what time may we expect you, Aragorn?" Palin had
joined Elrond, Celeborn, Galadriel and Aragorn in discussing a few
things and they were now making plans for tomorrow's goings on. The
older elf lord seemed to be hiding something, but he obviously wasn't
about to discuss it on his daughter's wedding day - in fact, he'd
studiously avoided mentioning anything that had to do or was concerning
Eiliandel.
"A little later, my lord." Aragorn replied, still using the
polite way of addressing Palin, "I have something planned mid-morning
tomorrow." he smiled to himself.
"Very well then, we shall meet after noon." Elrond said, eyeing
Aragorn. The man seemed entirely too pleased with himself.
"Tomorrow, after noon, it is then." Celeborn stood, Galadriel
rising to her feet alongside him, "If you will excuse us?" he looked at
his son-in-law. Elrond stood catching Celeborn's glance.
"I must leave as well." he said. There were a few more
pleasantries exchanged before all present left.
Arwen glanced at Eowyn, as they sat with the ladies of the
court, who were working on various decorations for Aragorn and Arwen's
upcoming wedding. The ladies were eyeing Arwen and whispering amongst
themselves, unnerving the elf to no end. Eowyn had tried to include
Arwen in the conversations, but Arwen had stopped speaking as the
other ladies had spoken over her. Now they were not even bothering to
ask the elf what she thought. Not that it really bothered Arwen - they
were not discussing anything that interested her anyway.
"So, my lady," one of the maids caught Arwen's attention, "Who
of us are you planning to have as your ladies in waiting?" she asked
boldly.
"My what?" Arwen looked at her startled. She'd never heard of
this and she could have sworn that she'd exhausted her father's
knowledge on the mannerisms of the race of men.
"Your ladies in waiting. Come, you must have heard of this!"
another maid chimed in.
Arwen looked over at Eowyn, but the blonde woman was not looking
up, "I cannot say that I have," Arwen chose her words carefully,
"Perhaps you would be as so kind as to tell me what they do."
A different maid appeared to roll her eyes before she spoke up,
"We would help you, particularly when there is a large function, such
as, oh, say, your upcoming wedding. We would help you get dressed and
prepared for it. Things such as that."
Arwen stopped herself from making a face. She hardly needed help
doing any of that. She'd been in charge of functions in her father's
household for centuries - and dressing herself for millennia more than
that, "I hardly think that I would need assistance in doing any of
those things." Arwen replied truthfully. The maids appeared shocked and
there was a raising of voices just as Aragorn entered the room.
"Arwen?" Aragorn's voice broke into the conversation. The ladies
immediately fell silent as the king walked all the way into the room,
"Arwen, I have a surprise for you." he came to stand near her. Arwen
looked up at him and took his outstretched hand. She offered a quick
polite nod before happily going with Aragorn - he could have told her
he needed her to help with Gimli, who had been their guest for sometime
and Arwen had learned firsthand that dwarves drank entirely too much -
and she would have been delighted to go with him. Anything to get away
from the ladies of the court. He lead her down several walkways before
leading her to a doorway where he stopped and turned to look at her.
"Close your eyes, Arwen." he said, smiling.
Arwen looked at him, "Why?" she waited for his answer.
"You'll see, you'll see." Aragorn smiled at her and turned her
to face the door, holding a hand over her eyes.
"Estel!" Arwen protested as he began to push her forwards,
steadying her as she stumbled forward, unused to having her eyes
closed. "Estel, where are we going?"
"Somewhere I think you'll like," his cryptic answer came, "Just
a little farther." Arwen hung onto the arm he'd wrapped around her
waist and gamely tried to keep her balance over the uneven stones of a
floor that she couldn't remember having walked across before - not at
least, by the feel of it. "All right, open your eyes." He moved his
hand from her face. Arwen blinked a few times as bright sun flooded her
eyes, but she soon could see. She saw a huge garden, much of it already
full of blooming flowers, creeping vines, thick green bushes of various
shades and all of it done in a elvish style way.
"Estel!" she gasped, unable to believe what she was seeing.
"This is for you." Aragorn smiled at the look of disbelief on
her face. She whirled to face him, completely astounded. Aragorn smiled
even more, "I thought you might be uncomfortable in a city such as
this." he admitted, watching her as she slowly walked forward to see
all of the garden. "Over here is something I thought you'd particularly
like." he reached out and took her hand and lead her in a different
direction. He stopped a while later, Arwen having said nothing, too
engrossed in looking at all the had been planted to be able to pay much
attention to where he was leading her. A stone bench, carved simply,
with ivy already growing all around it - up and down the legs of it and
weaving and wrapping it's way along the contours of it, sat in the
midst of three empty beds of dirt, with various plants, still in wooden
buckets, lining the walkway. "I thought that perhaps you'd like to
plant them the way you want them." Aragorn said indicating to the
flower beds and the plants waiting to be planted.
"Oh, Estel," Arwen turned around, and wrapped her arms around
him in a tight embrace, "This is so wonderful." She was smiling so
happily that Aragorn couldn't imagine ever seeing her do anything less.
"Go ahead," he said simply, letting her go and facing her in the
direction of the plants. Arwen gave him another smile before going
forward and beginning to arrange the flowers. Aragorn watched her for a
while, and then headed inside to take care of all that he knew was
waiting for him. He rounded the corner to go back the way he'd came and
nearly ran into Elrond. The elf said nothing, merely clapped him on the
shoulder and then watched him go.
"Quel amrun." Novrion said quietly, as he saw Eiliandel's
eyes open. He'd been watching her sleep, and since they had been up for
most of the night, he had been watching her sleep since the sun had
risen, though it now had to be close to afternoon.
"Quel amrun," she smiled sleepily, and reached out to touch his
face. Novrion smiled at her and reached out to move a thick strand of
her thick dark hair aside, letting him see her brilliant eyes.
"I cannot believe it," Novrion said suddenly, looking at her.
"Cannot believe what?" Eiliandel asked, looking at her husband's
face.
"Believe that I'm here with you." Novrion smiled at her, pulling
her closer. Eiliandel sighed and curled up closer against him. Novrion
had been thinking of suggesting that they get up, but he changed his
mind, looking at her peaceful face. He was more than content to lie
here with her all day than get up.
Arwen dusted the dirt off her hands and headed back inside.
She had just spent several hours planting all the plants that Aragorn
had given her to fill the empty flower beds with. She was so happy and
she wanted to show him what she'd done with what he had given her. She
checked his study, as she knew how to get there, but couldn't find him.
Shrugging to herself, she headed towards the main hall where she had
been with Eowyn and the other ladies of the court. She heard their
voices and headed in, knowing she could ask one of them where the
meeting hall was, since she did not know the way. She saw Eowyn, who's
back was turned as she lit candles to give the room more light. She was
about to say something, when she heard the ladies speak up, evidently
not having seen her in the doorway.
"I don't know what he sees in her," one woman was saying.
"I know," another agreed, "She is so simple seeming - she didn't
speak much to us and she didn't know what ladies in waiting are.
Honest, I wonder if she is no more than a pretty face."
"Speaking of which, I saw the guest list," a third spoke up,
"Guess who isn't attending this wedding."
"Oh, who?" another voice chimed in.
"Her own mother! Can you believe it? Her father's in attendance,
but nowhere does it say her mother will be coming," the third woman
spoke again.
"Wonder why," the first spoke up.
"She probably doesn't approve of her daughter marrying a man!
Honestly, why ever would an elf want to marry a mortal anyway?" another
woman said scornfully, "She probably can't get any of her own kind to
marry her." Arwen stood frozen in the doorway, unable to believe what
she was hearing. She knew she had not been talkative to them, but she
did not think it warranted this. Memories of her mother began to flood
her mind and tears slowly started running down her face as her memories
came back in full force.
At that moment, Eowyn turned around and caught a glimpse of
Arwen standing in the doorway, completely unnoticed by the ladies in
the room, "Arwen?" she breathed, suddenly wondering how long the elf
had been standing there. The ladies of the court froze and all of them
turned to look to the gentle figure in the doorway. Arwen looked at
them for a split second before whirling on her heel and rushing off,
the sound of a muffled sob as she vanished. "Arwen!" Eowyn shouted. But
it was too late, the elf was gone. Eowyn turned her angry gaze on the
ladies, "How could you!?! It is bad enough to speak behind someone's
back, but she was right there!" she glared. Without another word she
hurried off to try to find Arwen.
Newsletter Trivia.
Last week's answers: An Elven prince was smitten by her beauty, Issue 29; A hobbit. Issue 26.